So we have kicking.... lots of kicking.
It is amazing to feel your baby kick for the first time but after the 1000 kick I’m beginning to move on from amazement to thinking about how cramped it must be in there.
Think about being stuck in that little space for 9 months and constantly having to push on the outside to try and stretch your legs out. It can’t be comfortable. I certainly get over having my legs squished into an economy plane seat and that is only for a short time nowhere near as cramped as the womb. It brings to mind the Simpsons episode where you see homer floating in-utero and having plenty of room. By the kicking going on in my wifes womb I’m not getting the homer space vibe.
A recent trend I have noticed in our house is the explosion of baby brochures. Everywhere I turn there is a new brochure. I think they are breeding somewhere in the house. The latest one I found was about the Coles baby and toddler club. Everywhere has a baby club – spend dollars and collect points for more baby stuff.
That reminds me, I was in an Amcal chemist the other day and the lady behind the counter had a glint in her eye when I paid. She swiped my amcal card and said to me “you only have 42 points on your card but from the looks of your wife you will be getting loads more points soon” in other words baby means points.... she then said for each 500 points we get a $5 discount. Spend $500 for $5 off.. Bargain.. NOT... I was never even planning on spending $500 at the chemist. I think it has taken me 1 year to get to 42 points so currently it would take me 12 years to get my $5 discount. I suspect the $500 is somehow going to come around sooner than 12 years.
Some of my mates have decided to organise me a “mans baby shower”. I get the impression from their smirks that there is not going to be a lot in common with a normal baby shower and a lot in common with a buck’s party. I don’t think there will be any tea, cupcakes, pink wrapping paper or nappy towers at a man’s baby shower. It will be more around beer and getting a few celebratory cigars in before the birth.
I do like the concept of having a man baby shower though. It seems strange to me that the showering has only really developed only on the female side of things Yes she does have to do ALL the work in growing, pushing and feeding the baby but surely men deserve a little showering for providing seed, making toast, build cots and holding her hand at the birth. If I was allowed I would be delivering the baby and if it was a caesarean doing the cutting so I think some sort of showering is in order. I’m sure I will get showered beer at the very least.
So there is not long to go now. 13 weeks and 6 days as of today. This last week it has really begun to hit me that there is really not long to go and I suddenly feel very under prepared. What if it comes early... argghhh....
Friends keep saying we are very organised and prepared but it doesn’t feel that way and I’m beginning to realise that in 8 weeks or maybe less my wife is going to be big and not wanting to stray too far from home and the couch and airconditioning not really wanting to do much other than stay cool and grow a baby. I even found myself offering to do all the Christmas shopping yesterday. Looks like I have a busy 13 weeks and 6 days ahead (if it comes on-time) and then sleeplessness for years to come..
